Dogs are our loyal companions, and getting their trust is essential for developing a strong and healthy bond with them. Building trust with your dog is a process that requires kindness, clarity, confidence and competence.
Love is all you need?
There is a misconception that you’ll get trust from your dog by just being kind, loving and compassionate. This is not true. Animals, including humans, do not think like that.
Being kind, loving and compassionate is where you should come from. At least that’s my philosophy. Any animal lover comes from kindness and from compassion. But that’s not entirely what you trust, that’s just the starting point. Although it’s a must, it doesn’t stop there and it’s not enough.
When you trust someone is because he or she knows what they are doing, not just because they are kind or compassionate. Dogs and animals in general are the same way.
Let me give you an example. If you are in an airplane would you trust a kind and compassionate pilot that doesn’t know how to drive? Of course not. Would you trust a pilot that is insecure, incompetent or not qualified to drive? You wouldn’t, even if he or she was a very nice person.
When you really think about it what you trust is competence and confidence on top of kindness. The reason why I emphasize this is because most dog problems that I deal with don’t come from the lack of compassion or kindness. The problem is usually the lack of clarity, confidence and knowledge. Without clarity, confidence and knowledge, competence becomes an impossible task.
What’s the missing piece?
If you are a kind and a compassionate person the main way to gain trust with your pup is with guidance and leadership. By leadership I don’t mean being the Alpha or using dominance. I mean taking the responsability to guide and being accountable for it. Like parents do. YOU are responsible of your dog’s behavior and education. The difference between leadership and dominance is that the first one comes from acceptance and the latter one comes from imposition, force or fear.
Your dog won’t trust you if you don’t give guidance and lead with kindness, clarity, confidence and competence. The same way you wouldn’t trust someone that doesn’t have those virtues.
Here are some game changers to build trust with your dog:
1. Communicate Effectively:
Dogs communicate through body language, so it’s essential to learn to read your dog’s body language and respond appropriately with your own body language. This will help you to understand your dog’s needs and feelings better, and it will help your dog understand you better. This will make your dog feel understood and valued and will take your trust to higher level.
2. Be Patient:
Building trust with your dog sometimes can take time. Be patient with your dog and allow them to adjust to their new environment at their own pace.
3. Develop good timing skills.
Good timing means to read the rhythm of your dog’s learning and adjusting process. Allowing your dog/s to learn and grow at their own pace doesn’t neccessarily mean slow. Finding the rhythm and the learning pace of your dog it’s an art form and can safe you a lot if time and frustrations. Is like syncing with your dog.
4. Respect their uniqueness:
Every dog is different and it’s essential to respect this. If your dog seems uncomfortable or scared in certain situations, don’t force them to do something they don’t want to do. Instead, work with your dog and help them overcome their fears at their own pace. Helping a dog overcoming fears takes trust to a whole different level.
5. Be Consistent:
Consistency is crucial when building trust with your dog. Guiding in a consistent way will make your dog feel safe, secure, and comfortable in their environment, and it will help them to trust you more.
6. Set up clear boundaries:
Dogs feel safe when they have a clear understanding of what’s permitted and what’s not. When you don’t know the rules you can’t play the game. You don’t need a lot of rules, but the rules need to be clear. When rules are not clear, dogs become anxious, restless and aggressive. Providing structure and clarity will make your dog really trust you.
In conclusion, building trust with your dog is a process that requires kindness, clarity, confidence and competence. Building a strong and healthy bond with your furry friend will last a lifetime.
© Gabriel Riesco, Pawmos Dog Training LLC | All Rights Reserved March 2023